Thursday, November 16, 2006
Dumbass of the day
Ok For all of those of you strolling through from the randomizer or linking from the NaBloPoMo list, I'm doing a question of the day to answer via leaving a comment.
Question du Jour: What was the first CD you ever owned?
I already answered this yesterday- Pearl Jam - 10
So since Im a wee bit brain dead Ill share a story about a brain dead girl from my past.
My last year in college (the first time through) the housing I was supposed to have fell through at the last minute. Literally. I was supposed to be house sitting for a professor who was going on a year sabatacal. I arrived, key in hand, everything I owned loaded up in my plymouth horizon, walked up to the door to see a note- "Monica, do not move in, we need to talk, call us at xxx-xxxx" So I went to the campus police department (where I worked- it's not as weird as that sounds) and called and they told me that their daughter who had lived out of state had a nervous breakdown and moved home and would be there so sorry. Um ok, thanks for calling me before I left NJ to come here!
I was tired and grossly in need of a shower and now homeless. I had stopped at my friend's the day/night before and we went to the B52/Violent Femme's concert at an outdoor venue in the pouring rain (one of the best concerts ever BTW!) and then got up early and drove to school so you can imagine how gross I was. Fortunately the cops I worked with were great and let me into the gym to shower. Since everything was loaded in my car and school wasnt open yet for the semester I didnt even have a towel so I had to dry my hair with the shirt I had been wearing. Pathetic, to say the least.
My sister lived about an hour away from where I went to college so I drove there rather than live out of my car. I made a bunch of calls after I got to her place and found one of my sorority sisters was also screwed out of her housing and was staying with an alumna in town, and I could come sleep on her floor too and the two of us would find a place together.
Since this was a few days before school started you can imagine the pickings were slim out there. I wont even go into detail about some of the scary places we looked at. The scary place we ended up at was pretty far off campus, but since we were both student teaching that semester so we didnt care- it was pretty close to the bars and that was more important! ;)
The place was a duplex. The kitchen had a shower in it for starters. You could fry eggs and get clean at the same time. Then you went upstairs to the scary living room. It had wood panneling circa 1974 and -Im not kidding you- blue bandana print carpet. The big bedroom with it's booger green rug was through there and a tiny bedroom and bathroom with a tub and no shower was off that. There were no doors, just screens. Oh and it came complete with a roommate! (this is the brain dead girl I was talking about) She was nice enough, but I'm pretty sure that she is the reason people started making blond jokes. If one could personify a stereotype- it was her! Jen (the cool sister roommate) and I were tight, and if I have to confess- a bit snarky when we got together. We enjoyed tormenting Alison in very subtle ways. Our favorite way was to put on either Alive by Pearl Jam or Shiny Happy People by REM on repeat. For Hours. and hours. and hours... Shiny Happy People Holding HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANDS over and over and over and over. Ohooohoohoooh I-I-Im still alive.... Ohooohoohoooh I-I-Im still alive.... Ohooohoohoooh I-I-Im still alive.... Ohooohoohoooh I-I-Im still alive.... you get it. The best part was when we realized that she was too stupid to even notice. What she said one day was (and I quote) "I dont know how you can make fun of Wilson Phillips for having songs that all sound alike. That Pearl Jam's songs REALLY all sound alike". Yeah, she was too stupid to realize it WAS THE SAME FREAKING SONG!
Whenever I have a dumb moment, I think of that, and realize that I'm not that bad off afterall.
Another fun stupid thing about her- She had this boyfriend, Chris, who we really liked. Chris got kicked out of his apartment a few weeks before the semester ended, so he moved in with us for that time. What we realized and she didnt was that he was over her, but using her for a place to stay. On the last night before the semester ended (also known as "the night that never happened", but that's a whole OTHER story...) He decided to break up with her, right after sleeping with her. Of course we had the pleasure of hearing this whole conversation thanks to the screens instead of doors. It went something like this-
C- "when we come back after break I think maybe we shouldnt see so much of each other anymore"
A- "no, I think we still should"
C- "well I was thinking it's time to see other people"
A- "no, I am happy with you"
C- "well I think maybe it's time we just ended this"
A- "no, I dont think it's time for that at all"
and on and on. She was too stupid to realize he was dumping her. I'm not sure if he ever got it through her thick skull or if she and he are married now...
So that's my dumbass of the day story. Maybe Ill make it a regular feature...
So to sign off- a Thursday haiku or 4
dumbass of the day
a new story concept here
so many to choose from!
friday is almost here!
i hope i can make it through
work sucks monkey balls
made it past halfway
only 14 more days left
in nablopomo
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First Owned: Thompson Twins, Greatest Hits
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