Monday, July 10, 2006
Shit volcanos and other disasters
Yes two posts back to back. I just need to vent a bit right now and here seemed like the best place to do it.
So over the weekend I was cleaning the little boxes and over flushed. My little boy has been having some health problems recently (it all started when he ate a broom and caused his bowels to bleed- not pretty) that has involved us needing to switch foods- a few times. This latest food causes LOTS OF SHIT. So I was being lazy and instead of doing a few flushes as I scooped I did it in one. And yes, it clogged.
Now I moved a little over a year ago, and when packing I decided to throw out the plunger I had rather than pack something with toilet cooties. They're cheap, no big deal. Yeah, no big deal till you need one and dont have one. So I of course called my mom. Who lives in New Jersey. Yeah, like she could do anything... Well what she could do is make a suggestion that created quite alot of amusement around here. We decided that I'd try a little vinegar and baking soda to bubble up and hopefully break up the shitblock. Do you remember the episode of the Brady Bunch where Peter made the volcano??
So that was fun. And the clog remained. The cute part though was Ringo Stu Kitty trying to help. He kept standing with his front paws on the toilet seat peering in and meowing at the water to go down. Unfortunately he doesnt have this power. (maybe I should have asked magical Seamus! Oh well didnt think of that...)
So that was Saturday. I decided to ignore it all day Sunday because that's one of my favorite ways of dealing with annoying shit. (no pun intended) The theory behind this was that the water would soften the shitblock over time and it would go away. Yeah, that didnt happen.
So today on the way home from work I bought a plunger. It was a newfangled plunger that I apparently didnt know how to use. I thought it had plunged successfully but OH HOW I WAS WRONG.
I flushed what I thought was a now unclogged toilet and guess what? Shit waterfall. Pouring and pouring and pouring WHEN WILL IT STOP???? Im ankle deep in shit water. Ringo Stu is in the hall meowing his head off "make it stop make it stop!" Im trying to calmly explain to him that that was exactly my goal without crying. And then KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK. Yeah, my downstairs neighbors. Twas raining shitwater through their ceiling. Fortunately I think the shitwater was diluted enough to not be quite so obvious what it was. I answered the door with the phrase "yes my toilet overflowed, yes it is now under control and I am cleaning it up". They are a bit jumpy after the "pipe bursting 2x in one night and pouring rain into their bedroom" incident back in March. He said emergency maintenance was on the way. I told him to cancel. I did figure out the newfangled plunger and now have a freely flushing toilet. I sopped up the inches of water and now have a load of laundry going.
Yes this was EXACTLY what I wanted to do on a Monday night.
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OMG, that was funny! I mean, um, I feel your pain.
O-MY-YUKKK, you poor thang!
I was hoping the volcano wouldnt fully erupt, but - and Omygod and to have it go thru to your downstairs neighbors?? You have me in stitches, altho I've been in your shitshoes and it is no laughing matter at the time.
You see the water rising and rising and you are going 'no no - oh please stop...and .....well, you know, cuz you just went thru it lol.
Makes for great blogging tho!